Screaming Infidelities

Stressful days are here and I’m still stuck. I’m not moving forward.

I’ve been counting days and nights, but still no progress. Oh well. Life sucks that way, there’s nothing I can do about it.

Right now, I have less than 5 hours to finish my 6 pages Introduction [chapter 1] and my methodology [chapter3]. I can’t believe that I allowed myself to sleep the night off when I wasn’t able to finish anything. Except for the methodology part, I’m sorta almost done with that.. Haha.

Anyway there.. I am yet again multi-slacking.. the only thing I do the best during these times of life.

Seriously, I can’t think of anything sensible to put in my thesis proposal. I haven’t consulted with my adviser and professor yet, so good luck to me. It’s not that I am to lazy to consult. It’s just that I didn’t see her in school the whole week and I don’t know where to find her. Most of my blockmates who are under her weren’t able to consult either! (I think)

I know it’s not a good enough reason to NOT do anything about my paper. I am not trying to justify my slack. (REALLY)

My frustrations are eating me and I don’t know what to do. I know I have set all my plans and now, none of it are working right. I have to reset everything.

On other news:
Earlier this weekend, my sister gave birth to a beautiful girl named Ashley Maya. We visited her at the hospital and geez, it was amazing!

I can’t believe that my sister is now a mom… and that I am now a real “auntie”. Haha. I am excited to have the baby here at home and most probably I’ll be going home more often.

Here’s a picture of our little girl:

It’s amazing how time pass by so fast. I remember not so long ago.. my sister is just a teenager, like me. But now, she’s a grown woman with the responsibility of caring for another living human. I am so happy. For the longest time, we’ve been longing for a little one to lighten up our home and now here she is..

I know my sister will do well in raising her kid, just like our mom raised us. I must admit, I am envious of her. Haha. I want a baby too!! (but of course, not anytime soon). But if I will be blessed and God will give me one (even not conceptually speaking), I will gladly accept it. Maybe I should consider adoption! haha

That’s the topic assigned to our group for our BS 199.1 Class (Qualitative Research). It’s actually a good thing, for me, since I’m thinking of doing something about youth, and sexuality, for my thesis. However, the method that was assigned to us was kinda toxic. We’re doing KII or Key Informant Interview, sounds simple right? But not really.

Right now, we still haven’t finalized anything about our topic. What about youth sexuality? Well, maybe we could go on youth homosexuality, or youth knowledge about sexuality, yada yada. Then we have to narrow it down, what about homosexuality? what about youth knowledge on sexuality? perhaps the prevalence and/or activity on the former, and the extent or lack thereof of the latter. Sigh.

Then we have to look for contact persons from the government, gender office, lgbt reps9f we’re going to do homosexuality), DSWD, youth sector representative, schools, students, etc.etc.

Whew! 1 subject and I’m all stressed out.